Recently on Instagram (hello, you can see more of my face here btw!), I asked people what they’d like me to write. And one of the replies was about finding confidence in my style as a mid-size girl.
I can’t lie, I was a bit confused. I don’t think I’ve got this incredible sense of style. I’m definitely not a fashion blogger, even though I share mostly outfit photos on Instagram. I don’t follow trends or know about them half the time. Most of the time, I usually just throw on jeans and a t-shirt.
But – obviously there had to be a but because otherwise where was this post going? – I do dress for myself and with confidence. Well, most of the time I do. The confidence is never going to be constant, but I say it is there a solid 70% of the time.
I never used to be so confident in my style. It took me a while to get here. My best friends will have fond memories of reassuring me constantly, helping me into spanx or trying to find an outfit that hid as much of my body as possible during university.
And I’m always still working on it. Usually, I feel confident in what I wear. I know what my style is and what I like. So if you want to find confidence in your style as a mid-size girl, or in general, this is for you.
Find Some Style Inspiration
Usually, I wear a UK size 16 or 18, unless I’m in H&M because then I never have a bloody clue what size to pick up. To me, sizing and labels don’t matter, but I have a point here.
I am right in between plus-size and slim girls. And until last year, I really struggled to find anyone who looked like me for inspiration. It all changed when I discovered the mid-size community when the ultimate babe Lucy Wood created her #averagegirlsize.
Apparently some people have an issue with the phrase mid-size but, personally, I love it! Thanks to this ‘label’, I found a whole bunch of people with amazing style with similar body shapes to me.
I found that filling my social media feed with girls of ALL sizes and shapes – thin, fat, tall or short – really helped me to discover more confidence in my style. Surrounding myself with diverse bodies that all had incredible style inspired me to wear different things and just be confident with it.
Some of my favourite bloggers/creators for style inspiration are:
For me, bloggers and creators like this completely changed the way I saw style. Once I found girls like these, I basically copied everything there were wearing and tried to embrace some of their confidence.
Don’t Give A Crap About Flattering
I swear, if I see one more person or article chatting about dressing to flatter your shape or size then I might just have to kick off.
Stop telling people to ‘flatter’ their shape.
What does flattering even bloody mean? Do you want to know what is flattering? Seeing someone wearing clothes that they love and feel fantastic in. I can’t tell you this enough, but don’t give a crap about flattering your shape or size.
Just because there are some stupid articles dictating rules about what apple shapes or size 16 women should wear, doesn’t make it true. Nobody can tell you what to wear. The only things that you should be wearing are the things that you want.
Let’s be honest about this, wearing something that a fashion magazine says will suit or flatter you isn’t going to magically change the way you look. Your body will look the exact same as before, but just with some clothes on.
So you have seen you shouldn’t wear a crop top because your stomach isn’t flat, but you think they look cute? Wear that crop with pride girl!
If you’ve been too scared to wearing those trousers that you love because it is something that pear shapes should avoid, then stick on those trousers.
Quick side note – who even come up with the idea of using fruit to describe a body?!
The only things that you should be wearing are the clothes that you love! Who cares if it isn’t flattering? Let’s just stop avoiding certain items of clothing because some stupid made-up rules about body shapes.
I think the clothes that make someone look best are the ones that you can see that they love and make them feel banging.
Only Dress For You
Like I said, the only clothes you should wear are the ones you want. When you are getting dress and discovering your style, you are the priority. The only person who should be in your mind when you dress is you.
Don’t wear something for anyone else (unless you want to) or what the fashion industry is telling you to wear.
Discover what you like and wear it for you.
If whipping your legs out or having your dumplings (as my nanna calls boobs) on show make you feel fantastic, then you go for it girl. On the other hand, if you prefer to be more modest (although modesty is different to every person) and that’s what makes you feel incredible, then cover up a little bit more.
Either way, you have to dress for you. That’s the important thing. Wearing something for yourself.
Ignore the people saying you should cover up. Tell the people who have an opinion on what you wear to do one. Don’t let anyone tell you how to dress.
You shouldn’t dress a certain way because someone else has told you to. Your style is yours. So wear clothes that you love and feel bomb in to embrace confidence in your style.
Wear It With Confidence
Whatever you decide to wear, then always wear it with confidence. It’s easier said than done sometimes. But we’ve got to start somewhere and at least try.
[Related Post: Four Things to Help Your Body Confidence Journey]
Even trying to feel confident can make a massive difference. I really believe that with confidence, you gotta fake it ‘till you make it. If your confidence – real or otherwise – is shining in whatever you wear, eventually it will happen naturally and be more real
So throw on that outfit you’ve been too scared to try and wear it with confidence. Hold your head up high, accept compliments when they are given. Let the world see how amazing you look in that new outfit.
The more you do it, the more your confidence in your style will grow. Eventually, it’ll become second nature. You won’t have to try and feel confident, you’ll just feel it. Whatever you wear.
Don’t Take It Too Seriously
I’m not undermining anyone who works in, or completely loves, fashion. But why do we take it all so seriously?
I always thought fashion was supposed to be fun and full of self-expression. Although, I’m not entirely sure what I’m trying to express with my t-shirt and jeans combo.
So why don’t we just have some fun with it? Experiment with different styles and clothes. Don’t take it all too seriously.
It can feel like you have to be a chic goddess with a perfectly curated wardrobe full of gorgeous neutrals and tailoring. But that isn’t for everyone.
Discover what you like by messing around and having fun with clothes. The worst that can happen is that you’ll look like a bit of a tit. And I look like a tit in general, so who cares if it is because of my clothes?
I’m not a fashion blogger. I don’t have an incredibly unique sense of style. Half the time, I don’t know what the trends are for the season. Most of the time I just basically copy people I’ve seen on Instagram. And I don’t always feel 100% confident in everything I wear.
But I don’t take it seriously. I always try to dress for myself in the clothes I like and just fake the confidence until it becomes real again. So let’s just have fun with clothes and always try to wear what we want rather than what we are told.
How did you discover your style? What tips do you have to finding confidence in your style? Share them below!